Yesterday my portfolio did its job. Up 1.82% in dollars.

Converted back to Swedish kronor? Almost flat.

That is the quiet violence of a stronger krona. One day of decent performance in USD gets quietly erased by the exchange rate. And the entire portfolio sits in dollars, so this isn’t some abstract macro story. This is my actual net worth doing the limbo.

What caused the dollar to weaken?

Friday’s jobs report. Nonfarm payrolls came in at –23,000. Economists had been looking for something like +80,000. Previous months got revised down by a combined 103,000 jobs (see the official BLS Employment Situation report). The market did what markets do when they believe the data: yields fell, rate-hike odds for September got pushed back, and the dollar sold off against most major currencies — including the krona.

Cue the usual chorus. “The numbers are rigged.” “Trump is cooking the books.” “You can’t trust the BLS anymore.”

I’ve heard this song before. It’s the lazy take.

Revisions happen. They’ve always happened. More companies report later, seasonal factors get updated, and sometimes the initial number was just too optimistic. Calling every soft print a conspiracy is easier than admitting the labor market cooled more than expected. The market itself voted with its feet — it treated the report as real. That’s why the dollar dropped.

I don’t need the numbers to be fake. I need the dollar to stay strong.

Right now it’s doing the opposite, and my portfolio feels it harder than any headline about manufacturing jobs or government payrolls.

So here we are. A soft jobs report, a weaker dollar, and another reminder that currency risk is the boss of my entire portfolio.

Welcome to the De-Monetized Zone. This particular version was built by the Swedish krona.

Anyone else currently stuck here, or have you found a way out that doesn’t involve hoping the dollar suddenly remembers who it used to be?